My opinion about my group: erratum

I was mistaken... I admit I was under the blues while typing my previous blog. Hormonal imbalance even added insult to injury ... I am a shallow close minded creature that stayed inside the box not even having a courage to take a peak.. But at least my angel forced me through , and was surprised on what I found outside the box.. I was mistaken . My sgd groupmates are something more than what you see the superficially ... Most of them may have a strong personality , but it made them who they are in a good way... And some of them I are sooo cute :3 ,. I find entertainment in just listening to their conversations and stories of  adventures, . There is even one that became my best friend :)....
But it never made our group perfect... One of the person I consider really nice and true even from the start of 3rd year left... At that time I felt betrayed... Hey marketing, how dare you leave before me, that was my idea first ....
And the question , is the idea of leaving still there? Yeah, can't deny ... But opening up to other people , starting with my groupmates, made me forget a bit of that deem idea....

My relationship with my groupmates isn't really that perfect yet. But this is a good start... And right now , I discovered new friends with the same wavelength as mine (Will talk about it someday)...



P.s. We had a really great group Xmas party ! Lol

Depression diary 1

That feeling of not belonging or fitting in to a group... My 3rd year group was something like that... I am the alien in the group... I tried hard to fit in, but it didnt feel right... I may be delusional ,but I can sense the don't like me... Well, the feeling is mutual.... I can feel their wrath yesterday,. What's worse, a lot of bad thing happened that day... Some of my friends like my groupmates and would tell the tales of how fun and easy to talk they are. But to me it's one BIG task to make a NORMAL conversation .. I am always the " Conversation Ender " when they all talk about something and then I would TRY to comment or join in.... This is like high school all over again, full of bully pretty girls and jock boys....

I would understand if they won't get what I mean and accuse me of being a psycho path drama queen... Coz NORMAL people would never understand the complexity of a "Real" depression